Thread Tools

**Dudeus** · February 4th, 08:10 PM

some idiot 7th grader said he was a "mercanary" and was sponsered by empire. he said he had an empire timmy with a 70oz co2 tank. ****ing moron. he always tries to act cool. but he is like 3 feet tall

**commander colt** · February 4th, 11:08 PM

Few of my favorites........

"I'm either going to get a sniper barrel or a barrel upgrade"

after gawking at my scenario a-5 "Dude look at him, he's an army man, and he has an army gun"

"My viewloader has a double trigger so I can shoot a ton faster than you".......and after I outshoot him by a long shot w/ a stock 98 custom "how did you do that??! You're cheating"

and my personal all time favorite.........

A noob walks up to a pile of wet, bloated paintballs covered in mud and goes........"ooooh, paintballs!!!! Look at all these I found guys. i wonder why all these ppl walked past them" and then he puts them all in his hopper, then complains the rest of the day that his balls are breaking in his barrel and that he can't hit anything.

**tippy98cuser** · February 5th, 07:31 PM

my favorite still is when a noob walks on to his first game with his rental and says i'm going to be a sniper.

**PBiTalIaNsTyle** · February 5th, 08:48 PM

this happed today at the feild i play at
kid:hey what kinda gun do u have
me:an A5
kid:is that the automatic 1
me:nah.....its not
kid:cool i got a tippmann98.......*looks down at his gun* i mean a spyder tournament grade xlt

he was like only 10 tho but it was still funny

and the alltime favorite "im not gonna be on his team he has nitro that hurts more"

***crazycarfool*** · February 7th, 01:35 AM

Ok I've got one. I was at my local woodsball field about a year ago, in line to refil my Co2. The guy in front of me goes up to the counter and says "my hopper isn't loading paintballs into the gun" so the guy opens it up and looks inside. Somehow the kid managed to get a BBQ potato chip stuck in the hopper. I was right behind him trying not to laugh as the employee called all his friends over to look at what was in the hopper.

**Marine Machine** · February 7th, 10:40 AM

Some friends and I were playing paintball at a site the other day with some walk-on 8-year-olds (you can feel where this is going

). Anyway, we pelt it to the middle where this WW2 van is and put are backs against it while working out what to do next (not anticipateing that we would make the great distance without getting shot). While were discussing - throwing a couple of shots over are shoulders to keep the rookies at bay, are own 8-year-old walk-on team mates shoot us!

There should be an age ban or some sort of test - like an IQ test

- you have to pass before playing paintball!

**sakurai** · February 7th, 02:35 PM

once at Miami Indoor Field (pure airball field), these 2 noobs came in with camo. and after my friend and I lit them up...... they of course, *****ed, one took off his mask in the middle, stupid noobs try to rush us.

Then alter i heard the OWNER of the field tell them to stay back and be "snipers". i stared at him for like 5 mins straight, no wonder why that field closed down....... I didnt imagine that from the friggen owner.

**Marine Machine** · February 8th, 12:12 PM

The owner could of just been humouring them

**Brockocoli** · February 8th, 12:39 PM

i was at a local TOURNAMENT on Feb 6 and it was near the end of the day...a team we had OWNED earlier was talking to a group of players with about the same skill level as them. My team was watching a game and couldn't help but overhear their convo...

S=Players on team Sentinals black (we beat them)
N=new player

N: Hey are you guys playing this tourney today
S: Yeah
N: Cool, hey I like your setup
S: Thanks, i just got the egg yesterday
N: Yeah i was thinking about getting that for my 04 cocker
S: Is it an Electronic Autococker
N: Um, no...i dont think so.
S: Oh, then you wouldn't want to get an egg. If you get a hopper thats too fast for your gun, then you will start chopping alot and it will feed too fast...

**ARagingRebel** · February 8th, 02:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dudeus000

some idiot 7th grader said he was a "mercanary" and was sponsered by empire. he said he had an empire timmy with a 70oz co2 tank. ****ing moron. he always tries to act cool. but he is like 3 feet tall

70oz tank? lol moron should do his homework they dont come that big.

**703dEdLee** · February 8th, 03:34 PM

kid at my schools been playin for a while but only woods ball with his tippmann 98
he swears hes like a paintball guru and he found out that i got a gun n he was like
"man ur imp sucks my 98 will blow yours away"
me-how many bps does it shoot?
him-oh i dont have that on my gun its mechanical

**ARagingRebel** · February 8th, 09:46 PM

/\/\/\/\ o yeah i hear you. Last year when i was a senior, some freshman was talking trash saying that his R6 pirhana would own me and my suped up a-5. .....his R6 was a stock when i played him the following weekend. Then he screamed thats no fair, while i rained 15 bps of e-grip fury on his ass. and i also hate the kids that say that they are guru's when they only play woods or speed. Sorry kids, you have to be awesome at both to be a guru.

**Fubar2** · February 8th, 10:40 PM

My ricochet is rated at 25bps avg, and i've out shot it a few times.

**torture** · February 9th, 06:41 AM

lol some of my fav;s are:

hey sweet ANGLE

and 'hey no full auto' (which they usually say to everyone at my field that isnt renting)

**sakurai** · February 9th, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Marine Machine

The owner could of just been humouring them

no, he was serious...... trust me....... he tried to defend his point when i said there was no paintball sniping......

**Ryan_Page** · February 9th, 05:05 PM

i do not beleve in "sniping" in paintball, but technically, every paintballer is a "sniper" we get behind bunkers, concealing ourselves in a position, and shot at out target(s). defn. of sniping: shooting from a concealed position.

i can see why he was serious. though usually "noobs" take it in a different sense of the word... <_<

**#1Tango** · February 9th, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ryan_Page

i do not beleve in "sniping" in paintball, but technically, every paintballer is a "sniper" we get behind bunkers, concealing ourselves in a position, and shot at out target(s). defn. of sniping: shooting from a concealed position.

i can see why he was serious. though usually "noobs" take it in a different sense of the word... <_<

nicely put

**PumpPlayer** · February 10th, 09:49 AM

Back about 6 or 7 years ago, I remember the first marker that I bought that had a power feed on it. It was an ICD Bobcat (still have it, actually! Still shoots great.) Everybody else was playing with side-feed (tippmanns, a few BE's, etc.) and they all thought the 'power feed' was the coolest thing they had ever seen. There were plenty of stupid questions about that little device...

So one game, I get into a shoot-out with another player and we're dumping paint at each other. Honest, I did this... I turned the powerfeed off, fired a few shots of air, said, "Crap, I'm out of paint!" and then turned the powerfeed back on. The guy jumps up and starts charging me and I nailed him with about half a dozen rounds. His response?

"Hey, you said you were out of paint! That's not fair!"

Just for my little grenade story here, I was playing with a few friends and someone else on the field had a grenade and kept saying that they were going to 'get someone' with it. Two of my friends were in a little fort and we were battling it out with them from outside. This guy with the grenade says, "Hey, I'm going to chuck my grenade... cover me!" So he jumps up and starts running. Pulls the pin, winds up and... trips. He falls flat on his face and the grenade goes straight up in the air. Needless to say, he was covered. Super-funny.

**gamefaceowner3** · February 10th, 10:44 AM

Some noob said wow you have nitro that make your gun shoot faster.

**paintthecatBLUE** · February 10th, 10:04 PM

my little brother put a grenade in his pod (don't ask, hes a real tard) and at the end of the game it exploded, over half the pod was filled with a bubbly milky substance. evern the ref called him retarded for puting the grenade in the tube... i guess you had to be there...