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Old May 2nd, 2013, 02:26 PM   #1 (permalink)
waL
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Less than a week

after my 18th birthday my friends and I got caught breaking into an abandoned house. They called my parents(I’m 18 WTF) and gave me a parking ticket, but I don’t think we’re going down for breaking and entering. Dad is pissed takes away my car “until the end of the summer” when I’m going away to college, and apparently I’m “grounded” too. He went on to tell me how I’m a “crack whore” and if I don’t follow his rules then I can move out.

***** please, I’m moving out!

1) If I go to the bank with my bank book and ID, can I empty the joint account without them being notified?

2) Should I make a new account at the same bank and put the money in, or a different bank?

3) Where should I go?! No car... but I can get a ride to the train station or buses. Don’t want to stay with relatives because they will tell my parents where I am, and honestly I’d like to make my way out to California... what would be the easiest way to get across the country? NY->CA

Serious answers only please, don’t try to convince me to make up with them.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 02:30 PM   #2 (permalink)
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1. Depends on your bank. Some you can, some you can't. If it's a bank and not a credit union there's a better chance of yes.

2. Doesn't matter. If you open an account in your name only, only you will have access to the funds. If you want to go to Cali, you may want to consider a national bank so that you'll have chains available.

3. Bus is easiest to book, but honestly is INSANELY expensive for some trips (and cheaper than anything for some). Train would be the most comfortable. If you don't plan on taking a lot of stuff, check if SouthWest has any "wanna get away" flights for cheap to Cali.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 03:08 PM   #3 (permalink)
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1. Depends on your bank. Some you can, some you can't. If it's a bank and not a credit union there's a better chance of yes.

2. Doesn't matter. If you open an account in your name only, only you will have access to the funds. If you want to go to Cali, you may want to consider a national bank so that you'll have chains available.

3. Bus is easiest to book, but honestly is INSANELY expensive for some trips (and cheaper than anything for some). Train would be the most comfortable. If you don't plan on taking a lot of stuff, check if SouthWest has any "wanna get away" flights for cheap to Cali.
How would I go about finding out if I can withdraw all the money without any problems? Don’t want any risky business of not being able to take the money out or notifications going towards parents. Would I ask them to take all the money out in cash and then make a new account at a national bank? or should I ask them just to transfer all the money to a new account?
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 05:27 PM   #4 (permalink)
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You may be able to find the information online at their site if you can do it. It would require a lot of digging most likely, but might be there.

If you're serious about going to Cali, I'd definitely remove the funds in cash or a bank check when you did it and open an account at a national bank. Or even better, withdraw $100 now and go open an account, then when you DO remove everything, you've already got an account to move it into (wish I would have done that when I moved here, HUGE PITA having to go my first 2 months with no access to ATM's without paying fees since my new bank won't just CASH a check for 2 months, they require you to deposit it and it's not available for several days which isn't exactly convenient when you've just moved across the country).
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 05:39 PM   #5 (permalink)
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walk into the bank and ask about it.

miller has some great advice, as well.
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Old May 2nd, 2013, 05:45 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I think my parents just did something with my account... hopefully the money is there when I go tomorrow.
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Old May 3rd, 2013, 10:54 AM   #7 (permalink)
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What's the plan in California or do you even have one? What it sounds like to me is that your parents are treating you like their kid, probably because they are the ones paying your bills and looking after you, so in reality I guess your problem is that you want the perks of living like a kid (free room and board) but with the freedom and independence of being an adult (doing what you want when you want). You come across like a petulant child and so sheltered and clueless about the outside world that from what I'm seeing your parents would be saving your life by keeping any money away from you right now because the real world is going to eat you up and spit you out.

Oh and the cop did you a huge favour by taking you home and telling mom and dad because if he had treated you like a grown up busting into a house you'd have been arrested and charged and be saddled with a fairly serious career destroying charge on your record for LIFE. There are no great jobs that will hire people with a B&E on their record because while the charge has a fairly wide definition any employer is going to think you are a thief and not believe your story of urban exploration. You got yourself a mulligan don't screw it up.

I have lots of excellent serious advice ready to go once you have a serious problem or a serious plan.
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Old May 3rd, 2013, 01:19 PM   #8 (permalink)
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What's the plan in California or do you even have one? What it sounds like to me is that your parents are treating you like their kid, probably because they are the ones paying your bills and looking after you, so in reality I guess your problem is that you want the perks of living like a kid (free room and board) but with the freedom and independence of being an adult (doing what you want when you want). You come across like a petulant child and so sheltered and clueless about the outside world that from what I'm seeing your parents would be saving your life by keeping any money away from you right now because the real world is going to eat you up and spit you out.

Oh and the cop did you a huge favour by taking you home and telling mom and dad because if he had treated you like a grown up busting into a house you'd have been arrested and charged and be saddled with a fairly serious career destroying charge on your record for LIFE. There are no great jobs that will hire people with a B&E on their record because while the charge has a fairly wide definition any employer is going to think you are a thief and not believe your story of urban exploration. You got yourself a mulligan don't screw it up.

I have lots of excellent serious advice ready to go once you have a serious problem or a serious plan.
@&!^#($(&^@!&*@#&^%$%!^&*#&^%@^&!**&^@%#$%@^&!*!!! !!!!!!!!

I HATE when I’m responding to a thread and click submit and it says I need to login. Lose everything I wrote. Don’t feel like writing it again. FML. Forum needs work.

Anyway, I’ll sum it up for you.

>Crawdaddy is wise old man. Highlighted above is what I want^ and what I have gotten my whole life until now.
>Got kicked out of my house this morning, went to bank
>Realized I have over $50k in savings, and now that I’m 18 everything is MINE!!!!!!! (I was much more humble when I wrote this the first time)
>Money isn’t actually mine yet, custodial account, so they need to sign it over
>Parents won’t sign over money for obvious reasons, but the money is only getting 0.001% APY because the CD expired/times up
>I’m at the train station bout to go live with my brother for a bit, see if I can scare my parents enough to give me everything back
>Don’t actually plan on staying away from home for too long, I still want to graduate and my attendance is so bad they want me to go to high school for 2 more years (NOT SRS)

(semi-srs)

(I ain’t graduating)

(****)
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Old May 3rd, 2013, 03:40 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I can't help but agree with the Mulligan comment - These police did you a HUGE FAVOR.


You're not going to like, enjoy, or agree with what I'm about to say - just fair warning. Read at your own risk.

You're an individual living in your parent's house. You're 18. You haven't graduated high school yet. With all due respect, you still are a kid. Your parents are doing their absolute best to keep you in line - and their methodology is by punishing you by taking away what you enjoy to make you realize what you did is not acceptable behavior - for a kid or adult.

Right now - based on what you just said about B&E + Trespassing - you are acting more like a child and less like an adult. This is also furthered by your impulsive decision to rebel against their proposed punishment, as opposed to attempt to negotiate or acceptance of it.

Being frank with you - your parents have put effort into making sure you are set up for success in this life. You have $50k in savings, a college education in your future, and had the support and credit line of your parents.

Right now - you are doing nothing but rebelling against an authority figure who is attempting to continue their teachings of personal accountability and social/legal behavior. Your parents are trying to help you. Punishments aren't issued without warranted reason. Again - just because you're not in agreement with it - doesn't mean it isn't warranted... (if I had one, I'd have whooped my kid....)

You are old enough to realize two things here:
1) You can't be punished anymore...
2) You can't act like a 10 year old anymore

I would strongly advise you to go back home, apologize for what you did - take your lumps, and re-evaluate your situation. Often times, we overlook the gifts we're given until we realize just how hard it is to do things without them. I recently had the opportunity to speak to a close cousin-friend of mine. He chose to leave his house at 16, pursue an independent life, live as he saw fit, and rebel however he pleased. I stuck it out, got 1/2 educated, made my mistakes, but had a safety net and assistance.

He just left a job at an oil change place for a position as an associate at a furniture store. I'm an analyst in a BI area at a Fortune1000 firm pursuing the balance of my 4 year degree.

Sometimes...it pays to sit down and think about things before deciding you don't like the situation you put yourself in. A little pain now - can result in you being able to paintball later.

I know it seems like the end of the world and loss of your independence... but - this is what they decided is the consequence for your actions. If you did something wrong...you will receive consequences for it. If you did something wrong... are they really in the wrong?
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Old May 3rd, 2013, 05:04 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by waL View Post
>Realized I have over $50k in savings, and now that Iím 18 everything is MINE!!!!!!! (I was much more humble when I wrote this the first time)
>Money isnít actually mine yet, custodial account, so they need to sign it over
>Parents wonít sign over money for obvious reasons, but the money is only getting 0.001% APY because the CD expired/times up
>Iím at the train station bout to go live with my brother for a bit, see if I can scare my parents enough to give me everything back
>Donít actually plan on staying away from home for too long, I still want to graduate and my attendance is so bad they want me to go to high school for 2 more years (NOT SRS)

(semi-srs)

(I ainít graduating)

(****)
sorry wal, but i agree with most of the guys here.

you dont have the money but heres the kicker, even if you do then what? you think 50k is going to get you through the rest of life? Im going to guess the car you have is under their name not yours, so its going to be gone and even if it is under your name so what? you have a car and 50k in your pocket ASSUMING they sign it over to you. also assuming that you do not graduate you, at best, will have a car, 50k and nowhere to live and since you did not graduate the vast majority of potential jobs will not even look twice at your application especially considering that it is spring and there are now boatloads of new college and highschool graduates that are looking for jobs, why would they hire you when they can hire someone that graduated?

so you find a cheap apartment, that 50k will be gone in roughly 2-3 years just in living expenses and that is assuming you dont need any of it for medical bills, car repairs etc. while living with spending as little as possible

and it doesnt matter that you are 18, if I am living in the college dorms still and got arrested for breaking and entering the school wouldnt care, they would kick me out. doenst matter that i am 18, 21 or 36. Age is just a number, it doenst mean there are suddenly not consequences for your actions

honestly the best move here is to apologize (regardless of if you feel you should be able to do what you want or not) and keep living at home where it is free. the only other free place you are going to find to live for the rest of your life is under an overpass in a cardboard box

I mean gosh if one of my friends called me up and was like "hey, I have a spare bedroom in my place if you want it, I wont charge you rent but I just ask that you do the dishes and take out the trash when it is needed" Id be on his front door in 10 minutes wearing an apron and rubber gloves.
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Old May 10th, 2013, 10:09 PM   #11 (permalink)
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You sound like a little ****. Listen to your parents and do what they say before you ruin your life.

Week old thread but **** it.
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