Lump of Coal - Paintball Forum - Paintball guns and gear forums

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Old December 7th, 2004, 01:46 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Thumbs up Lump of Coal

Wow, as I was getting my new order ready off of Xpaintball last night, I found the following item:

http://www.xpaintball.com/luofchco.html



"Looking for a present for your favorite paintball brat? Look no further than our very own Xtreme Lump of Coal. Our competitors may offer what you think is coal, but only with us are you assured a genuine, 100% pure product, in its own Zip-Loc baggie with a card that says "Christmas Coal" (in case the recipient is unsure of your intentions). It may not be edible, but it is flammable; it is also quite suitable for framing. This lump is the first in a projected line of designer coals: Coal Porter, Nat "King" Coal, Natalie Coal (for the truly talentless), Nicoal Kidman, and Anna Nicoal Smith (available for sale to adults only). If sales go well, we are considering a line of edibles and imbibables, starting with Coalby Cheese and Xtreme Coala. Look for these products in the future at Xtreme.

And in case you think this is a joke, it's not. If you order this, you will receive an actual lump of coal, just as pictured."


I love the last part. I can't remember the last time I saw an online store made a spoof like that.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 01:52 PM   #2 (permalink)
 
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send it to headly for banning seminude women avatars
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Old December 7th, 2004, 01:56 PM   #3 (permalink)
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send it to headly for banning seminude women avatars
we ALL decided on that. And if anyone wants to narrow out a mod, blame me because I made the thread about it.

Obey forum rules or leave, I really don't care.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 02:03 PM   #4 (permalink)
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WTF, whya re you people being gay about it.. I dont agree with the 'new' rules about avatars, but hell, keep it to the suggestion forum or PMs if your going to *****. And don't diss headley. He has a mag, therefore he's cooler then you.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 02:04 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Thumbs up

Quote:
Originally Posted by Christian
we ALL decided on that. And if anyone wants to narrow out a mod, blame me because I made the thread about it.

Obey forum rules or leave, I really don't care.
Quoted for truth. Not only that but I stood 100% with Christian on this one, and Headley just happened to be the first one with gonads enough to make an announcement about it.



Not only that but if you backtalk Christian you'll have to deal with me...I'm coming home to Mason for Christmas (no joke, I live there) so I'll beat you up. With a TASO Stone Cold II 21-incher. LOL.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 02:29 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I personally don't think scantily clad women have any place on a paintball forum, unless they, of course, are engaging in some form of paintball.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 02:30 PM   #7 (permalink)
 
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yes, as much as i like those avatars i agree with the mods.

anyway... how much are those lumps of coal?? Sounds like some lousy "money maker" scheme to me. Are they serious about the brands and the flavors??? Thats gotta be the dumbest thing ive heard in a long time..
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Old December 7th, 2004, 02:35 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Best product ever. Medic, you should put one in each of your kid's stockings and hide the presents in the closet for later.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 02:38 PM   #9 (permalink)
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I put a lump in my brothers stocking once.. WEll it wasn't coal persay.. IT was a piece of rock from our basement.. WE have this giant rock that goes under our house adn comes out in our neighbors basement.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 02:54 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Thumbs up

I'm seriously thinking about buying it for a few members on the board, or even for my little brothers.

Only thing is, they'd cry because they thought they were bad. But then again, together, my little bros make a tag-team that rivals Godzilla and King Kong combined.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 03:45 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jrow17
yes, as much as i like those avatars i agree with the mods.

anyway... how much are those lumps of coal?? Sounds like some lousy "money maker" scheme to me. Are they serious about the brands and the flavors??? Thats gotta be the dumbest thing ive heard in a long time..
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Old December 7th, 2004, 03:46 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Heck dude, that's a deal and a half.

Once you get depressed that someone gave you coal, you can pop it into your fireplace and watch that sucker burn. And you can snuggle with a girl while you stay warm...whether from the fire or each other, it's a win-win situation.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 03:47 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Or, eat it, crap it out and make a $2 diamond.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 03:48 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Or, eat it, crap it out and make a $2 diamond.

LMAO

Good one man...the guy sitting next to me just looked over at me like I was a mentally handicapped thing or something for giggling so hard. Mad props.

<3
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Old December 7th, 2004, 03:53 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Just a giggle? My jokes deserve a guffaw!

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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:07 PM   #16 (permalink)
 
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man dude that is pretty dumb
2.00 for a piece of coal?!?!
and how much for shipping on it
LOL
just go to wal mart and get the bbq coals
those will work just fine if u want


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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:20 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Wow our sponser is gay. But if they actually sell that ****, then props to them.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:27 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Flatliner105
send it to headly for banning seminude women avatars
You may wanna reconsider that since i was one of the few that went to bat for you when you were banned.

Why does PBF have to be like every other paintball thing and support the "sex sells" image? If that is what you come here for then take your attitude and leave. Or just keep it up and someone will make it much easier for you to do so.

- Brian
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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:35 PM   #19 (permalink)
 
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Brian, the topic is the lump of coal above... c'mon now. I'm thinking about giving this to Alpha for Christmas, instead of the case I promised him.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:39 PM   #20 (permalink)
 
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send it to headly for banning seminude women avatars
Quote:
Originally Posted by Christian
we ALL decided on that. And if anyone wants to narrow out a mod, blame me because I made the thread about it.

Obey forum rules or leave, I really don't care.
Owned.
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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:47 PM   #21 (permalink)
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Brian, the topic is the lump of coal above... c'mon now. I'm thinking about giving this to Alpha for Christmas, instead of the case I promised him.
I was responding to Brandon.

Now to get back on topic...

How about we all buy one, and send them all to FastEcho
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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:49 PM   #22 (permalink)
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Ha... I did give "lump of coal candy" last year to the kids.. they didn't get it..



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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:52 PM   #23 (permalink)
 
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How old are they... you haven't told them about what coal means then?
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Old December 7th, 2004, 04:55 PM   #24 (permalink)
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Ha... I did give "lump of coal candy" last year to the kids.. they didn't get it..
Thats a fantastic gift. Thats just plain awesome. Where'd you get it?
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