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Discussion Starter #1
im hoping we can manage to keep this one serious, i just need some input on this one guys...

ok, ive been going out with my girlfriend for like 1 year and 4 months. We are absolutely in love with each other. Both are parents are hoping we get married, her parents love me like a son, my parents love her like a daughter, its basically all perfect. She wants to marry me one day, which sure does make me feel secure, lol.

BUT, she got what she called "a reality check" about 3 weeks ago, and she realized she found that guy she wants to be with forever, and shes only 18.

My girlfriend is the kinda girl that is one of the guys, and hangs out with the guys, shes a really cool girl. But of course im a jealous bf and i always got pissed when she was hanging out with her guy friends. And reality hit her and she realized that for the rest of her life shes gonna have to have my approval to go somewhere.

so for about 3 weeks we have been "on a break" with complete intentions to get back together after a little while, or after i can learn to treat her like an adult and trust her judgement, and after she learns to appreciate me alittle bit more. To put the stereotype to rest, no shes not looking to go screw around, this girl is the worlds biggest prude, and i went out with her for 7 months b4 i got any action. She just needs her own space.

Well, now that u know my situation, now i can ask for input. I want to get back together, sooner the better. I thought if i never talk to her or see her she will miss me more and want to get back together. But then i thought if i do that we might lose touch and all.

the past 3 weeks we have been hanging out like once or twice a week, and are kinda fu#! buddies, basically so we stay sexually satisfied.

so my question is, do u think i should

A. never talk to her or see her until she wants to get back together
B. be like her best friend and stay close
C. Just see her every now and then
 

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I was saving that bacon
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How about appologize to her for trying to control her life by censoring where she went, and tell her that you want to get back together.

If you do that everything should be fine in a short time. But seriously, the more you stay apart, the further you each drift away.
 

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Discussion Starter #5
toXic said:
How about appologize to her for trying to control her life by censoring where she went, and tell her that you want to get back together.

If you do that everything should be fine in a short time.

i already did the first part.

we recognized whats wrong and know it, we just need alittle more time now to change,


toXic said:
But seriously, the more you stay apart, the further you each drift away.

thats exactly what i was afraid of, so i guess i should try to stay close
 

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Discussion Starter #6

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With my gf I always tell her to go out with her friends anywhere they want. Guys/ girls, I don't care. Although she knows I am kinda jealous and I really don't want her hanging out with guys, so she respects it.

So I think it depends on the girl. But yes, guys have to learn to how to trust their gf's. And no matter what, we all know we trust the girl, but we don't trust the guys b/c we were once them!
 

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dude, i was in almost the exact same situation my freshman year in college. i was best friends with my girlfriend before we went out, then we started dating and what not. she was back home, still in highschool, and she couldnt deal with the long distance crap. we broke up and got back together a bunch of times then eventually she started dating a good friend of mine (shaddy ****, i know). well i was pretty crushed, to say the least. i tried talking to her a lot still, just cuz i was good friends with her. dont kid yourself though, if u guys break up and want to remain friends its not gonna happen. it will never be the same, at least not for a while. every time i talked or hung out with her i would hope that this was the time we would get back together


my advice is this: if you guys break it off, dont talk to her at all. it will only make things worse. give it a little time so wounds can heal. if you keep talking to her it will only make things harder. im not saying to break off the friendship, just give it some time. if you dont it will be awkward forever.


sidenote: my roomate broke up with his g/f a few months ago and he still talks to her all the time. she is messing around with another guy and he is still all depressed and wants to get back with her. the kid hasnt been on campus on the weekends for the past month and a half because A) he cant deal with the fact he cants spend the weekends with her, and B) we wont let him drink liquor (he cant handle alcohol for ****) and he wants to drown his sadness in it. its pathetic and she is making it worse. dont be that guy, lol
 

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<3 I love fat chicks <3
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im extremely jealous and my girlfriend respects that, she used to have a problem with it but she doesnt now, she knows i trust her but that i dont trust the other guys that might take advantage of her. we've been together for 9 months now. so i say, if she really really loves you like she says she does or you says she does, then she wont care about it and will respect that about you. as time goes on trust grows, maybe she needs to understand that if she wants to be with you, she has to understand that. serious relationships arent easy, but they are well worth the trouble.
 

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PBaholic #14
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Well it sucks to hear that man.. becuase my gf is kind of the same way.. and i get a little mad too... :?




Hope this isnt any forshadowing :dodgy:
 

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PAT McCORMICK said:
or after i can learn to treat her like an adult and trust her judgement
There is so much to say... I know you how you feel with the whole jealousy thing.. my gf is mormon (a little ;)) and she is "nice" to all the girls and guys in her little church. After a while that **** doesnt even phase me man. You just gotta realize that shes going to have a social life outside of you. A bowl always always always helps.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
like, we were best friends b4 this break, and we still are.

last night we hung out in my bed..... under the covers ;) and watched the little mermaid (no im not gay, lol) tonight we're goin to the movies. Like, there are no bad terms at all.

And u guys nailed it RIGHT ON THE HEAD. I do trust here, i just dont trust guys, cause ur right, i was one of them once and i actually know their intentions
 

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PAT McCORMICK said:
like, we were best friends b4 this break, and we still are.

last night we hung out in my bed..... under the covers ;) and watched the little mermaid (no im not gay, lol) tonight we're goin to the movies. Like, there are no bad terms at all.

And u guys nailed it RIGHT ON THE HEAD. I do trust here, i just dont trust guys, cause ur right, i was one of them once and i actually know their intentions
Ya i know how you feel.. all guys, including myself, when they see a girl they want, whether they are sober or drunk, do some pretty ****ed up things to get in the girls pants. I dont know about you, but ive had a convo such as this with my girlfriend:
"If you ever cheat on my we are over for sure" -me
"i know, what if its not my fault"
"how"
"what if some guy kisses me"
"then you better push him away and tell me who he is so i can kill him"

She loves me to much to ever cheat on me... it would really be a waste of a good relationship... you gotta talk to her, just tell her that u wanna be back together... i mean ****, it seems like u are already acting like it..

theres only so much strangers from an internet forum can tell ya.
 

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Discussion Starter #17
well we just spent the night together. movie, dinner, ...... other stuff. It was a great night. You would think we were back together

shes making it seem like shes found "that guy" (being me, lol) and it scared her, and just doesnt want that holding her down at age 18. She was my first serious relationship, so i was alil overprotective, and i guess i made her feel tied down

the spolied brat is going on a cruise with her family in 7 days, when she gets back, im gonna go for it, i'll keep u guys informed on how it goes
 

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Discussion Starter #18 (Edited)
i think shes starting to feel bad about doing this whole break thing with me, and starting to regret it,
 

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i'd keep contact, but don't stalk her(meaning call her every day and all that) just keep the connection and eventualyl she will want to get back togather, but you my friend need to stop trying to make decisinos for her, if she wants to go out with her friends(even guys) then let herm idk if its a matter of trust but that is something youre gonna have to get over. and if that seems like im trying to attack you im not becausee i have been there before.


good luck after the cruise.
 

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I've been through all of this, and if yall are really in love, she'll come back and things will be better than ever.

I was dating my girlfriend for 3 years before she got the same feeling yours did. After about 2 months of her hanging out with her friends, and a few guys, and even dating one, she came crawling back,. cause she realized no one would treat her like i did. As bad as it sounds it was kind of pathetic.

my advice would be to sit around and let her come back. Don't go out of your way to talk to her, but don't ignore her. If she treat things the same, tell her that yall are taking a break, because if she doesn't get this out of her system now, she'll end up doing it later down the line.
 
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