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Its never lupus
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9,169 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
4/20 + standardized testing
So heres the story.

our school is poor

And we ****ed up STAR testing (standardized testing) last year (the year I wasn't there). So we have to do hella good and have over 95% attendance if we want the state to get off our asses. Guess when the first test is?

April 20th.

Now you guys don't know my school. Classrooms are half full on 4/20 and a good 2/3rds of the school is messed up. And they're stupid enough to schedule standardized testing that means the future to the school on a day when everyone is gonna be high as kites.

Thats messed.

My tailbone

So heres how it went down. In PE me and all the other white kids (there are like 8 of us in 3 classes of 30) like to mess around and tabletop eachother. Cus we're tight like that. Me and Gribble come out and he has the ingenious idea to tabletop some poor mother****er. We chose nick.

Now let me give you background info on Nick. He's hella short, hella skinny, weighs 98 pounds and is hella funny. And he can ride bowls like no other. Also he acts like he can whoop anyones ass but he's always joking and **** and everyone knows he's not serious.

So, since I like Nick I don't push him hard enough for him to trip, so he just ends up sitting on Gribble.

Now gribble is determined to end up with nick on the ground, so he takes his arm, through nick's legs and up to his chest. Then he lifts him up like two feet and drops him.

It was the funniest **** ever.

Now Nick's all mad at me and talking his usual ****. He kicks me a few times lightly and its all good.

Now we get to the track after doing grinders (kinda like suicides but from harder to easier and we have to stop and do a number of crunches and pushups). Well we walk out to the track, do this thing with water and fail. Then we get in a circle and makes us run a lap, no biggie, 1/4 mile. But after running a 1/4th of a lap I feel a hard object hitting my tailbone. Turns out its Nick's foot. It hurts like you wouldn't believe. Still does too.

I go through the rest of PE and then english waddling around like I **** my pants hella bad and sitting in incredibly awkward positions. But hey, on the bright side I get to see a doctor soon, get some painkillers (hopefully medical marijuana, and on 4/20 it'll be perfect), and chillax at home.

Oh yea and my mom gave me this stuff for calming you down, you put it under your tongue and since you have so many blood vessels so close to the surface it dissolves in. I took two of these and they were hella fun. Plus she gave me some pink pill with numbers on it. And I almost got her to give me some anti anxiety stuff that made her play air guitar before her breast surgery.


<3 mucho <3

P.S. this chair is so damn comfy on my ass, and pooping hurts like a *****.
 

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Its never lupus
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9,169 Posts
Discussion Starter #3
KingFikiElectra said:
Nice bro. U have a kick ass life, well at least a kick ass story. I hope u make it to practice.
oh I'll make it, just don't shoot me in the tailbone, or I'll throw up and pass out.
 

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Wheeeeee!
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1,366 Posts
(****, it's April 20th and I just now realized it. Might not... make it to class today...)

Me and Gribble come out and he has the ingenious idea to tabletop some poor mother****er.
hm... 'tabletop'... A term that seems to have a diffirent connotation than I had originally thought (I hope).

Oh yea and my mom gave me this stuff for calming you down, you put it under your tongue and since you have so many blood vessels so close to the surface it dissolves in. I took two of these and they were hella fun. Plus she gave me some pink pill with numbers on it.
Your mother's a drug dealer? :D
 

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Wheeeeee!
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1,366 Posts
420. It's a number, and conveniently a date, that is celebrated in America and abroad for it's significant relation to marijuana.

and April 20, therefore, has become something of a grass-roots (no pun intended) festival, in honor of this.

tl;dr: People smoke lots of weed on April 20th.
 

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Its never lupus
Joined
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9,169 Posts
Discussion Starter #9
Shytkicker said:
(****, it's April 20th and I just now realized it. Might not... make it to class today...)


hm... 'tabletop'... A term that seems to have a diffirent connotation than I had originally thought (I hope).


Your mother's a drug dealer? :D
No, shes a microbiologist. She knows hella **** about drugs though. But the stuff she gave me you can buy anywhere, without a perscription.

Aright I'll do some ASCII art of tabletopping in steps

step 1 (target some poor mofo):
..()
>[]<
..[]
../\
./..\

Step two (get in position)
...........((__|.....|....))
............\__|.....|___/
.[(*_*)]...\_ |....|__/
/*/...\*\...|_|.....|_|
\*\.../*/...|_|.....|_|
^°°°°°°°°°^°°°°°^
P2_______V____P1

p2=person 2 v=victim and p1=person 1

Step 3 (P1 pushes V)

..()....()
>[]==]
..[]....[]
../\..../\
./..\../..\

step 4 (V trips over P2)
.....()
...././--• <--V
....[]__
[__].\
|...|..*
^
P2

step 5 (V lands flat on his back

o{_]<
GROUNDOWNED

DOMO ARIGATO MR. ROBOTO
 

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Its never lupus
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9,169 Posts
Discussion Starter #11
timeismonkey said:
Sorry to burst your bubble, but you won't get medicinal weed for busting your tailbone. If it's not even broken, you'll be lucky to get anything better than weak hydrocodone. Cool story though. And what are those relaxant things you put under your toungue?
believe me man, its broken. I know I probably won't but it'll still be uber cool if I did.

The relaxants are called like gaba calm or gava calm.
 

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happy 420!
I made a 420 thread but it got deleted... o well

bummer about the tailbone. My buddy matt broke his by falling down some stone steps. ouch. (in spanish= el~oucho! french= le ouchions)

Good luck with the medicinal bud...

question: would they give you a medicinal bhong also? or maybe medicinal papers...
*pondering*
 

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tippmannbeast said:
happy 420!
I made a 420 thread but it got deleted... o well

bummer about the tailbone. My buddy matt broke his by falling down some stone steps. ouch. (in spanish= el~oucho! french= le ouchions)

Good luck with the medicinal bud...

question: would they give you a medicinal bhong also? or maybe medicinal papers...
*pondering*
Currently, they only give medicinal weed to people with diseases that smoked marijuana relieves the symptoms of, such as reducing nausea from chemotherapy and what not. The weed comes in containers. There are 300 joints in each one. Yes, I know it sounds wonderful, but it's not used as a pain reliever for broken bones, unfortunately.
In case your wondering how I know, I just did a research paper on medicinal marijuana. Good luck scoring some painkillers though, you should verbally intensify it, if you know what I mean. ;)
 

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Its never lupus
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9,169 Posts
Discussion Starter #15
oh. Nutso. Maybe I can fake glaucoma or some ****.

But yea I got vicodin. Wee!
 

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Its never lupus
Joined
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9,169 Posts
Discussion Starter #17
Cockerkid63 said:
Haha we call that kick in the tailbone thing in our school a svincter. It hurts alot and i couldnt walk n if feels like ur going 2 shizit yourself.
The sphincter is the muscle inside your rectum that keeps poo and farts in.
 

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Its never lupus
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9,169 Posts
Discussion Starter #19
zpyro said:
Nice choice of words :rofl
not really. All my friends are like "don't get so butt hurt over it." then they laugh it up. I can kinda feel the vicodin kicking in, tight.
 
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